


drunkduction

by ironicsopsychotic (delightisadream)



Category: House of Anubis
Genre: Canon Compliant, Chosen One, Drunk Shenanigans, Gen, Group chat, Humor, Missing Scene, Post-S2 Finale, Sibuna, includes some texting, osirian, post-290 party, the chosen one and her osirian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-13 06:34:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29647236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delightisadream/pseuds/ironicsopsychotic
Summary: drunk introduction, also known as sibuna shouldn’t drink when trying to catch eddie up on literally everything.
Relationships: Sibuna - Relationship
Comments: 7
Kudos: 14





	drunkduction

The party at Anubis House was as much a celebration of Senkhara’s banishment and Rufus’s death as it was a night to forget the issues that still plagued them. For Mick that meant losing his girlfriend to  _ Jerome Clarke,  _ and for Eddie that meant learning he was something called the Osirian and he’d just effectively done the aforementioned banishing. So it really didn’t come as a surprise that, despite having met twenty minutes prior, the two blonds found a way to sneak in alcohol for their friends.

Which wasn’t a problem until Alfie started throwing up in the girls’ toilets, Sibuna plus Eddie clamored into the bathroom with him.

Alfie leaned closer to the toilet bowl, his hands firmly grasping the sides. “What kind of alcohol was that?”

Eddie couldn’t remember, but luckily it didn’t matter. Nina said, in a slightly chastising tone, “Shouldn’t you have asked that before you had any?” Fabian nodded in agreement, Amber sighing serenely.

Patricia cackled, leaning her head close to Eddie’s. “Serves you right. You stole my cup three times!”

Alfie basically whined, “But it tasted so gooo— _ alch!” _

Normally they wouldn’t have made it a habit to accompany Alfie to the bathroom, but the circumstances were a little tricky. Eddie having shown up in the library and revealing himself to be integral to the mystery and Nina’s Chosen One status left a lot of gaps in his understanding. Sibuna wasn’t really “Sibuna” without a mystery at play; however, it only felt right to essentially induct Eddie into the club. But that meant explaining everything that had happened so far—and doubling back to last year.

They’d gone through the basics of being the Chosen One to make sense of what just happened, but after blazing through Senkhara and the marks that left the Cup of Ankh. If Eddie had thoroughly enjoyed Patricia’s conspiracy theory about Joy’s death, then he’d enjoyed learning both Nina and Amber were victims to her fits with food even more. It was well past pin drop by then, so whatever kicks they got out of reliving the drama had to be quiet. They were holed up in Nina and Amber’s room as per usual—the closest room to Victor’s office, as luck would have it. Although, as Amber pointed out, “Joy literally just died; he can chill.”

Then Alfie had booked it to the bathroom, a hand firmly clamped over his mouth, and everyone had just followed. They weren’t done recounting everything for Eddie and Alfie hated being left out. They’d barely even touched on Jerome’s disastrous involvement.

“Jerry” caused another round of giggles, echoing off the bathroom walls just as much as Alfie’s retching. Nearly everything that had gone wrong seemed hilarious when painted in a “here’s what you missed” light to Eddie. Fabian found it less funny when Eddie called him out for dancing around Nina the year before, something Nina chuckled at from her position on top of the sink, her back against the mirror. It couldn’t have been comfortable—but then again, Eddie was currently in the bathtub, Patricia was tucked away in that spot between the tub and sink cabinet, and Alfie was permanently pressed into the toilet. Only Fabian and Amber looked content with their choices. Fabian was sitting against the door while Amber was practically curled up, her head in his lap.

“Okay,” she said from her position, speaking toward the ceiling. “Weirdest thing to happen this time. Mine was learning Fabian can pick locks with bobby pins.” Fabian scoffed from above her. Amber just smiled.

“Can  _ all of the above  _ be mine?” Eddie asked, only half joking.

Patricia lightly shoved at his head, pushing him away from her. “That’s a cop out.”

“Fine. I guess waking up to Senara or whatever.”

_ “Senk _ hara,” everyone corrected.

He rolled his eyes. “Again:  _ whatever. _ I banished her, didn’t I? I think that gives me the right to pronounce it wrong.”

A ghost of a smile crossed Nina’s face. “I’d have to say Gran getting marked, but that doubles as a terrifying moment, so... Maybe speaking to Victor’s dad?”

“Yeah,” Alfie coughed, took a moment to calm his breathing, and then turned to look up at her. “Are we getting any more details about that, or…”

She paused, but ultimately shook her head. “No. Doesn’t feel right to share it.”

“Speaking of things we shouldn’t share—me crossing the chasm while blind?” Patricia said, giving everyone the eye. “We all got hexed and shit, but no one else had to deal with  _ that.” _

“The hexes!” Alfie yelled. “Mine. I called it! No one else can take it!”

Eddie laughed. “Yeah, Patricia, you want to talk about your hex?”

She glared at him, but there wasn’t any real heat behind it. Not anymore. “Nice try. Everyone knows I had to deal with your sappy ass without my voice.”

“Did Jerome ask you about your little brother, Alfie?” Amber posed quietly, her eyes shut. Fabian rested a hand on a lock of hair, fanning it out over his knee.

He shook his head, face obscured. “No, not after I turned back… Although we might’ve talked about Mara and how he needed to cut the crap and ask her out.”

“Well, mission accomplished,” Eddie said, closing his eyes now too. The tub wasn’t even close to a real bed, but he could fall asleep easily.

“Yeah, like a month later.”

Nina blinked slowly. “Was that really a month ago?”

Patricia held out her hands to count on her fingers, but she didn’t get far. “You know what, I’m not sure.”

“Everything seems to blur together now,” Fabian agreed, face contorting. Sibuna had way too many things to deal with to keep track of.

Amber shifted in his lap. “What’s your moment, Fabian?”

He gave it some thought, then kind of laughed. “I still can’t believe Jerome ended up in the tunnels at all,” he decided, tipping his head back.

“Really?” Patricia snorted. “Rufus has always been creepy with Jerome. I might even say worse than with me.”

That was one part of last year’s story Eddie hadn’t appreciated in any way. ‘Renee Zeldman’ kidnapping Jerome was a mistake on his part, yes, but kidnapping  _ Patricia?  _ And his dad  _ letting her stay there?  _ Whenever Sweet finally took him up on that offer to explain the Osirian, he’d most definitely bring that to light.

“I think him crawling into the library is what surprised me the most out of his involvement,” Nina said, swinging her legs. “I knew Amber and Alfie had gone down there, but Jerome? Perfect timing. Literally.”

Eddie frowned, his eyes unfocusing. “What about the tunnels and the library?”

“There’s a secret passageway connecting them. That’s why they didn’t need amulets.”

It took a second, but then he got there. “Wait, so…” Eddie paused to gather his thoughts, his cheek fully pressed against the rim of the tub. “Is that where we went on that blind date?”

“Actually, we were all there,” Amber said helpfully, looking way too comfortable with her head in Fabian’s lap and her legs touching Alfie’s.

Eddie’s head shot up, his gaze sweeping over everyone—catching Alfie mid-vomit, regrettably—taking in Fabian’s sheepish expression, Nina trying to hide her laughter, and Patricia’s borderline murderous glare at Amber. “You what.”

Patricia looked to the rest of the room, clearly asking for help. Finally Nina cleared her throat and offered haltingly, “It was, um, for the reflector task.”

His eyebrows furrowed. “Which one was that?”

Alfie let out a particularly loud noise, then coughed out, “Does it really matter?” before face-planting into the toilet again.

“We, uh, we needed another person and Patricia needed time for a date, so…” Nina awkwardly scratched at her arm, pointedly avoiding Eddie’s gaze.

He continued to gape, his clouded mind taking extra long to compute this. “I—Yacker, I tried to make out with you down there!”

She pressed her lips together and nodded. “Yep.”

“Twice!”

She just continued nodding, her eyes widening.

“To be fair,” Fabian cut in, eyes failing to focus on one thing, “she did try to stop you.” Amber squirmed in his lap, humming to herself.

“Didn’t stop my gagging,” Alfie grumbled, his voice echoing slightly from within the toilet bowl.

This was all too much to take in. Eddie forced out a laugh, his vision growing uncomfortably warm. “Thanks for reminding me to keep my feelings to myself, forever. All of eternity.”

Amber’s words began to slur. “No, nooo, it was so cute. Especially when you said you’ve never met anyone like her before. Maaaaaajor boyfriend points.”

“What, are we just quoting from memory now?” Patricia snapped, hoping to derail the conversation.

Fabian, apparently just caught off-guard or drunk enough to joke around, muttered, “I just need to hear your whiny British yack and I turn to mush.”

Eddie immediately cut his eyes at his roommate, fully aware he couldn’t look threatening when sitting in a tub with a burning face. It didn’t matter, because Fabian wasn’t looking his way when Alfie laughed and repeated it. Amber joined in, shifting to singing the words out. A few seconds later and even Nina was harmonizing with the three of them, crooning from atop the sink.  _ “Whiny British yaaaaackk—” _

Even impaired Eddie knew he kind of wanted to be swallowed up by a hole in the floor like that not-uncle Rufus had been. In an effort to block out the shockingly harmonious singing coming from two thirds of the room, he turned to his girlfriend.

Patricia just gave him a thin smile, palms up. “No more secrets?”

  
  


In the morning, Mara woke up feeling refreshed and happy. Mending any sort of friendship left with Mick would take work, but right then all she was thinking about was getting to see Jerome for their first breakfast as boyfriend and girlfriend. She wondered if he’d be waiting for her at the bottom of the stairs. Joy groaned from across the room when she voiced this wish, promptly covering her face with a pillow.

She had gotten to her feet and pulled on a thin robe, a smile working its way onto her face as she did so. She was just  _ so  _ content. Nothing could make it better, not even Patricia grumbling when Joy would eventually join Mara in moving around the room and thus waking the grump up.

But Mara had missed Patricia’s empty bed, instead opening the bathroom door to a mess of limbs and Fabian now slumped half on the floor and half over Amber from the door’s movement. Mara’s eyes scanned the room, noting Nina somehow curled into herself on the sink, Alfie’s cheek firmly pressed on the toilet seat, and Eddie and Patricia’s heads beside each other on the bathtub rum. Except Eddie was actually  _ in  _ the tub.

It took her a second to adjust, and then she was backtracking to her room for her phone.

**_H of A_ ** _ | 8:03am _

**[mara]** _ bathroomsleepover.jpeg _

so what happened here

**[joy]** AHAHA OMG THATS WHERE THEY WENT

**[mick]** ik i just met eddie and all but i really expected him to know alfie was a lightweight

**[jerome]** thanks babe i’ll use this for blackmail

**[nina]** oh my god what

**[jerome]** shit

**[mick]** serves you right

**[joy]** calm down

**[nina]** i just woke up how did you GET this??

**[mara]** simple: i woke up before you all

it wasn’t hard, considering i had MAYBE two sips last night

**[nina]** we didn’t drink THAT much

**[fabian]** no we did.

**[eddie]** it’s less fun if you limit yourself—just ask alfie

**[nina]** do NOT ask alfie

**[mick]** we didn’t bring that much tbh

not enough to warrant… that, anyway

**[jerome]** clearly australia has muddled your perceptions of anubis

**[joy]** imma have to agree here, everything’s batshit crazy

**[nina]** okay i have to turn my phone off

i have a splitting headache

**[eddie]** oh damn really, me too

wonder why

**[nina]** didn’t know sarcasm came w the job

**_H of A_ ** _ | 11:22am _

**[amber]** omgggg alfie didn’t look that dead in person

**[patricia]** tell me how i completely forgot eddie was in the tub

**[eddie]** my back didn’t forget

**[fabian]** neither did mine.

**[nina]** guys i was literally on a sink

half my butt was in the basin

**[alfie]** _ @mick  _ i RESENT that

i am not a lightweight

i just drank almost everything

**[jerome]** good lord alfie

**[fabian]** that explains a lot.

**[joy]** i wouldn’t mind sneaking more alcohol in now and then but alfie needs to be put in timeout or something

**[alfie]** YOU WERENT EVEN THE ONE THROWING UP

HOW CAN YOU MAKE THAT DECISION

**[patricia]** uh, maybe bc it was OUR bathroom??

**[jerome]** yk when you said you understood wanting a change of scenery i didn’t think you’d actually do it

**[eddie]** wtf change of scenery

**[nina]** don’t ask

**[eddie]** since when are bathrooms that interesting?

**[mick]** hey man, since you’re the new roomie better get used to fabian’s pining over nina WHILE he’s dating her

**[fabian]** i do not.

**[alfie]** yeah you do

**[amber]** yes

**[mara]** can’t hide it, fabian

**[eddie]** you act like i haven’t dealt w that already

i have other things to adjust to

**[patricia]** oh shit yeah

**_anubis backwards_ **

**[patricia] added [eddie] to the group**

welcome weasel face

**[eddie]** i’m touched by your obvious display of affection

**[amber]** nuh-uh he still needs to do the initiation

**[nina]** agreed, it’s tradition

clearing in the woods at 3?

**[eddie]** whoa are we murdering someone?

**[patricia]** *you’re murdering someone

**[fabian]** just a tiny sacrifice.

**[patricia]** sacrificing *yourself

**[nina]** bring something of importance

**[eddie]** god yacker shut up

**[alfie]** lmao whiny british yack

**[amber]** ✨ whiny british yack ✨

**[nina]** ✨ whiny british yack ✨

**[fabian]** ✨ whiny british yack ✨

**[eddie]** yeah yk what i think i will sacrifice myself

**Author's Note:**

> i just *heart explodes* i’m not too crazy about how this turned out tho tbh
> 
> i'm [ironicsopsychotic](https://www.youtube.com/ironicsopsychotic) from youtube, so if you like my hoa vids please give this fic some love! kudos, comments, bookmarks, all that jazz. (also come harass me on my tumblr, [exceptionallyopinionated](https://exceptionallyopinionated.tumblr.com/).)


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